PERCEPTION BOX

QUESTIONS

Want a fast way to get people to stop signaling, bragging, fronting, and masking who they really are and just get REAL with one another (and themselves)? Try these out:

TRY

AR FILTER

SHALLOW END

Who are you still trying to please?
What do you want people to believe about you?
Are there any ways of being that society judges as “not good” that make you feel nourished and alive?
Do you have an outfit that makes you feel attractive? Why?
Do you consider yourself a defender of underdogs? What’s comfortable about that for you?
Have you ever acted mean or bullied someone? Why?
Have you ever carried around a secret (about yourself) that you dreaded other people finding out about? What was the fear?
What does ‘self-care’ mean to you, and how do • you implement it in your life?
What does society value that doesn’t matter to
you?
What rules do other people follow that you like • to break?
What’s a memory that you keep returning to, and • why do you think that is?
What’s the best advice you got from someone you don’t like?
What’s the worst advice you got from someone you admire?
When was the last time someone told you “You’ve changed?” What did you assume they meant, and how did it make you feel?
When was the time you sacrificed for someone else and got back 10 x in return?

Have you ever found yourself acting like the very type of person you can’t stand? What was the circumstance?
Have you ever tried to “become someone else” to change people’s perception of you?
How would you describe the difference between who you are publicly and who you are privately?
How do you think others would describe the difference between who you are publicly and who you are privately?
How do you think others would describe the difference between who you are publicly and who you are privately?
What do you fear most about the aging process?
What do you find beautiful that others don’t?
When you had a rough day, what’s the first thing you do when you go home? (Be honest). What does doing that do for you?
Who are you still rebelling against, and why?
In what area of your life do you not trust yourself?
In what area of your life do you trust yourself most?
What’s comfortable to you but also limiting?
When did you feel truly celebrated?
Where has your ego taken a hit in a way that ultimately served you?
Where have you made an assumption about someone else that turned out to be incorrect?
When have you made an assumption about a peer only to discover you were (mostly) wrong?

DEEP END

What do you still feel like you have to prove - to the world, to someone else, or to yourself?
Do you ever feel like you have to make excuses or apologize for aspects of yourself, and if so, why?
How does the thought of your own mortality influence your daily decisions and long-term goals?
How has your understanding of love and relationships evolved over your lifetime?
In moments of deep solitude, what major concerns or questions about yourself tend to dominate your thoughts?
What are you most afraid will never change about yourself or your life, and why?
What aspect of yourself are you now grateful for • that in the past you struggled with or hated?
What do you most often assume other people are • thinking about you?
What personal sacrifice have you made that you • regret the most, and why?
What personal strength are you most reluctant to • acknowledge, and how has it impacted your life?
What personal weakness are you most reluctant • to acknowledge, and how has it impacted your
life?
What would it take for you to fully forgive • yourself for past mistakes?
When have you experienced a profound sense • of disconnection from others, and what did you learn from it?
Have you ever felt like you were living according to someone else’s standards or values? In what way?
Have you ever gone through something upsetting or painful that you later viewed as a blessing?
What action do you want to take but don’t feel ready yet?
What do you feel like you’re not allowed to share and why?
What is your most consistent and greatest fear about yourself?
What was a time when you were really down, when something didn’t go your way, and you found something to feel grateful about anyway?
When were you able to empathize with someone who held differing values, convictions, or beliefs?
Where in life did you care too little and what was the result?
Where in life did you care too much and what was the result?
In what circumstances do you find yourself comparing yourself to other people and why?

PAIN HOLE

Who in your life do you blame or criticize most often?
In what sort of conversation do you find yourself getting the most defensive or wounded?
If someone doesn’t understand what you’re saying, and you get upset, what are you making it mean about you?
In what area of your life do you feel not good enough? When is the first time you remember feeling that way?
In what ways are you limiting your own potential?
Is there a voice in your head that tells you how bad you are - that says “you’re selfish / you’re spoiled / you’re stupid”? Is that really true? In what ways and / or how not?
The last time you were angry, what did you make it mean about someone else? What did you make it mean about yourself?
What are you most afraid is true about you?
What are you most afraid of finding out about yourself?
What are you most afraid that someone else will find out about you?
What do you have to ignore to keep believing what you believe?
What have you not forgiven yourself for? Why not? What are you afraid will happen if you do?
What is the biggest “should” you are putting on yourself? What’s the risk in letting it go?
What is the one thing you never want your spouse (or closest family member) to find out about you?
What is your greatest fear about you?

What have you not forgiven someone else for? Why not? What are you afraid will happen if you do?
What need inside yourself have you been neglecting? When did you start neglecting it and why?
What part of your life story do you usually leave out, and why?
What’s your greatest hope about yourself?
Who in your life do you blame or criticize most often and why?
Have you ever had an emotion and not made it mean anything, about anyone else or about yourself? What was the result?
If someone disagrees with you, and you get upset, why? What are you making the disagreement mean about you?
What’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told someone else?
What’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told yourself?
When do you take things personally? In what sort of conversation do you find yourself getting the most defensive or wounded?
When have you let go of a deeply held conviction? What did that lead to?
Where has pain served a purpose in your life?
Who would you be if you dropped all your identities, labels, and affiliations?
What was a time when you gave up expecting anything, when you even gave up hope, and it led to something beautiful or profound?
What was a time when you were really down, when something didn’t go your way, and you found something to feel grateful about anyway?